Odds: 1 in 112 million

On average, two people in the U.S. are crushed to death underneath vending machines each year. Please snack responsibly.

2. Dying in an Airline-Related Terrorist Attack

Odds: 1 in 25 million

No one has died in an airplane-related terrorist attack since 9/11. The pat-downs of elderly people and toddlers are really paying off.

3. Having Identical Quadruplets

Odds: 1 in 15 million

Identical quadruplets would be adorable, but you wouldn’t be able to support them because you probably won’t win the lottery…

4. Becoming President

Odds: 1 in 10 million

Mitt Romney has seen these odds and he likes them.

5. Dying From Bee, Hornet, or Wasp Stings

Odds: 1 in 6.1 million

Who knew bees were so scary? Then again, bees may not be as much of an issue this year.

6. Dying From Being Left-Handed

Odds: 1 in 4.4 million

It’s a right-handed world. Apparently, a fair number of left-handed people die each year from using right-handed products incorrectly.

7. Becoming a Movie Star

Odds: 1 in 1,505,000

There’s more than one way to make money in this world, and movie stardom is a better bet than playing the lottery.

8. Dying in a Plane Crash

If you are too scared to board a plane, why did you just buy a lottery ticket?
 

9. Death by Flesh-Eating Bacteria

Odds: 1 in 1 million

Not as rare as one would hope, but there are worse ways to die. Maybe.

10. Getting Struck by Lightning

Odds: 1 in 1 million.

A lightning strike is probably still preferable to flesh-eating bacteria.

11. Dying in a Bathtub

These odds are not an excuse to stop bathing.

12. Dying in an On-the-Job Accident

If this applies to you, you may want to take a risk and buy that lottery ticket.

13. Murder

Odds: 1 in 18,000

14. Dying in an Asteroid Apocalypse

Odds: 1 in 12,500

The good news is that this will probably never happen. That is, until the year 2040, when it’s totally going to happen!

15. Dying in a Car Accident

Odds: 1 in 6,700

Good luck driving to the store to buy that lottery ticket.